Finding what your child deems engaging and loves doing is important from a developmental and practical viewpoint. To find a place where he belongs will give him a sense of identity and purpose with a clearer view of what his future might look like. So, while it may be a difficult exercise to help a young child pinpoint what captures his interest, it’s a worthwhile endeavor not only for your child but also as a fulfilling process for the parent. There’s nothing more rewarding than helping your child find that thing that he loves.
In the beginning, focus on getting a general image of one or more of the areas in which your child is interested. Then follow that lead like a determined detective. Here are our tips on facilitating this process:
Start as Early as Possible.
It takes time to develop as a human being. The process of trying out and eliminating activities can start as early as preschool. But no matter what your child’s age, it’s never too late to start searching for what piques his curiosity.
Provide Opportunities to Explore.
The best way for your child to discover what captures his attention is by simply doing. For the youngest set (preschool/early grade school), provide a set of diverse experiences with different types of activities. An older child may have exhibited signs of what floats his boat, so start from those clues and look for related activities. Whenever possible, solicit your child’s help in choosing these activities so that he has some buy-in and will be more committed to the path you both agree upon.
Listen and Observe.
Whether it’s over dinner or in the car, seize the opportunity to talk to your child about his day, his friends and the things he has done that excite him the most. Take careful note of the activities that he chooses to do during his free time, even if it involves a TV show or YouTube video. His programming selections may provide clues to undiscussed passions. Engage him in deciding what to do on vacations. His choices may speak volumes about his interests and can help steer your search for activities that engage him.
Be Flexible but Firm.
Avoid the urge to pigeon-hole your child into one interest when he is still in discovery mode. If a child senses pressure from his parents, the results can be negative. That said, it’s important to recognize when to quit and when to stay with the program. When a situation is creating undue stress, family strife or just isn’t fun anymore, it may be time to look for a new activity or interest. But if the child wants to quit an activity because he’s anxious or unsure of his own abilities, quitting might only encourage a habit of giving up, which is definitely not what you want. In this case, help your child work through the challenging times to build grit and tenacity.
Take It to the Next Level.
Once your child has found his groove in an area of interest, start looking for ways to help him develop and improve his skills and put him in the company of like-minded individuals. This might mean finding private coaches, enrichment classes, and summer camps. If you have a hard time finding the right activities, you can help your child create his own opportunities by starting a club or special project at school, or by interacting with community organizations that can support and nurture your child’s interest. If your child wants to show his chops to the world, consider entering him in competitions which will encourage him to work hard to improve his skills, assess his strengths and weaknesses, and learn how to stay the course even when the going gets tough.
Get Help.
Get some help on this journey by leveraging the know-how of parents of older children, especially if their children share the same interest as your own. If you are not acquainted with anyone who can help, consider tapping the knowledgeable network of Parent Advisors at Versed. On this site, you will also find a comprehensive Opportunity Guide (coming soon!) that lays out in a searchable, easy-to-reference format many of the programs, classes, camps, and competitions that are available in the U.S. for different areas of interest.
Let’s face it: one day your child will need to write about his passions or interests in his college applications. By encouraging him to find his interests early, he will have an easier time in the future. Remember childhood is a time of self-discovery when it’s ok to try on different hats until finding the ones that fit best. Happy hunting!
“There are child prodigies. A few. My mother was a music prodigy. The rest of the family had to explore our career paths in normal ways, by exploring.” - M.B., September 2017
If you are interested in speaking with one of our Advisors about helping your student develop an interest, you can schedule an introductory free consultation here.
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